Confessions of a Sloth

If there was one of the "seven deadly sins" that I always thought was slightly laughable, it was the sin of sloth. I always pictured the dead guy in that movie Seven (with Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman) and thought, well, I get out of bed every day and am mostly productive; I'm good to go. I mean how many people in our society struggle with laziness to that extent? How many people literally do nothing? Come on. Sloth?

Apparently I needed a wake up call. We recently received our issue of Relevant Magazine in the mail, and I was flipping through this morning when I came across this article entitled "A Stealthy Enemy" by Jeff Cook. (Follow the link, search by article and check it out.) For whatever reason, it piqued my interest, so I actually took a few minutes to read it. It begins with a great illustration of our disinterest as a society, and then says this:

"Sloth is not about laziness. It's not about taking time to rest or failing to be a good little capitalist. Sloth is about indifference--indifference toward the soul, indifference toward other human beings, indifference toward the world, indifference toward God.

...At its core, sloth moves us away from everything that ultimately matters and hands us diversions instead. Drug users, TiVo addicts and excessive video gamers may be poisoned by sloth, but so are most workaholics, for sloth is content to aim us at either lethargy or fanaticism. It only matters that the target of our energies is worthless."

Ouch. Just as I was having that exact same thought about myself and my life the other day. What am I doing that really matters? I'm doing countless numbers of things that could matter; being a mother, a wife, a teacher, a friend, a church member, an American, a human being, etc. But do I really care? Am I really living my life like it matters?

I cannot remember the last time I ended a day with a sense that I had actually given up myself that day; that I had actually lived out a day outside of my power and reliant upon the life of Christ inside me to get me through. I can't remember the last time that I joyfully sacrificed for those in need, compassionately listened to someone else's problems (and actually cared for them in listening), or even spent time seeking after God's desires and looking forward to His kingdom. In the mirror of Christ, my reflection is not looking so hot.

My hypocrisy makes me sick. I'm tired of playing the game and faking my way through to the next day. My life is not to be wasted, and there's too much at stake for me to be living for me. "Wake up, you sleeper!" (Eph. 5:4). It is well past time for me to repent from my sin of sloth.